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TN Amendment 1.5 could prevent men from removing bowling balls from rectum for 9-month period

in Health/Politics/Sports/Rec
Bowling ball (Used under the CC-BY-2.0 license. Source: flic.kr/p/7zBSmp)

This election cycle, Tennessee voters will vote on Amendment 1.5 to the state Constitution, which could prevent men from removing bowling balls that have been lodged in their rectums for a 9-month period. The proposed amendment would read: “Nothing in this Constitution secures or protects a right for a man…

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Man Xpo about sports, trucks and perpetuating patriarchal hegemony

in Culture/Sports/Rec
"Macho Man" Randy Savage (Used under the CC-BY-SA-2.0 license. Source: flic.kr/p/6To3sn)

Man Xpo, called “Chattanooga’s first manly man event,” will celebrate sports, hunting, trucks, cigars, beer and the perpetuation of the patriarchal hegemony today at Finley Stadium and the First Tennessee Pavilion. “James Brown sang, ‘It’s a Man’s Man’s Man’s World,’ and no truer words have been sung,” said Man Xpo…

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All nine Chattanooga soccer fans gather to watch World Cup

in Sports/Rec
Soccer (Used under the CC-BY-SA-3.0 license. Source: tinyurl.com/pksshq2)

Last evening at the local Irish pub Shane MacGowan’s Teeth, all nine soccer fans in Chattanooga gathered to watch the U.S.A. team defeat Ghana in a 2-to-1 victory at the 2014 World Cup in Brazil. “We did it! We did it!” said resident Corbin Wegner, a longtime fan of the…

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Little Debbie adds competitive eating to Ironman Chattanooga

in Food/Drink/Sports/Rec
Ironman competition (Modified under the CC-BY-SA-2.0 license. Source: flic.kr/p/fw6sWK)

After officially becoming the title sponsor of the inaugural Chattanooga Ironman competition, snack food company Little Debbie and its parent company McKee Foods announced that it would add a competitive eating section to the race. “The Ironman triathlon is an institution in the world of athletics,” said Little Debbie spokesperson…

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“We Buy Golf Clubs” ad to be featured during Super Bowl

in Business/Sports/Rec
Mike's Golf Shop ad

The world-famous advertisement for Mike’s Golf Shop in Chattanooga, featuring proprietor Mike Mixson’s clear declaration of “We buy golf clubs,” is slated to be featured during this Sunday’s Super Bowl broadcast. The ad rose to prominence last autumn, when it was featured on CBS Sports, Forbes, MSN, AdWeek and many…

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Marion County to install traffic cams to track aggressive bicyclists

in Politics/Sports/Rec
Bicycle camera (Modified, used under the CC-BY-2.0 license. Source: flic.kr/p/2X7nYi)

Residents of Marion County were rocked by the news that two teens in a truck were terrorized by what could only be described as a deranged bicyclist who wielded a camera-phone and touched the truck’s bumper with his hand, and inspired by the Lookout Mountain community, which recently raised money…

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Trampoline lane proposed for downtown streets

in Sports/Rec
Broad Street with trampoline lanes (Used under the CC-BY-SA-3.0 license. Source: streetmix.net)

Trampoline enthusiasts in Chattanooga are eagerly anticipating the opening of three trampoline parks planned in the next several months – Jump Park Chattanooga, Superfly Trampoline Park and Jump Park Ooltewah – but now they have another reason to jump for joy, with a proposal to add a “trampoline lane” to…

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Marion County football coach tattoos rival’s logo on forehead to inspire his team

in Sports/Rec
Marion County High School assistant football coach Michael Schmitt

Earlier this week, Marion County High School assistant football coach Michael Schmitt was arrested and charged with vandalizing his own school by surreptitiously spray painting the logo of rival South Pittsburg High School and derogatory names in an attempt to rally and energize his own team before a game between…

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Cleveland State Lady Cougars change name to Lady MILFs

in Sports/Rec
Cleveland State Lady MILFs

At a press conference yesterday afternoon at Cleveland State Community College, it was announced that the women’s basketball team had changed its name from Lady Cougars to Lady MILFs, soon after the opening of its 2013-2014 season. “The name ‘Lady Cougars’ didn’t bring to mind the image we wanted,” said…

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BREAKING: Deceased prostitute discovered in trunk during Rossville area “Trunk or Treat” event

in Culture/Sports/Rec

According to witnesses, a deceased prostitute was discovered during a local “Trunk or Treat” event at an unnamed Rossville area church. Bystanders reported the prostitute was discovered under a KFC bucket of candy in the trunk of an unmanned vehicle during the event. “One minute you’re dressing your kid up…

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