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Riverbend

Riverbend organizers wake from 19-year cryogenic hibernation, book hottest bands from 1996

in Culture/Riverbend

At a press conference yesterday afternoon, organizers of the annual Riverbend summer music festival announced the final lineup for this year’s event, after being cryogenically frozen for nearly two decades. “We listened to all of you who said to us, ‘Show me the money!’” said Riverbend organizer Joselyn Boykinns. “We…

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Faith and Family Night headliner TobyMac revealed to be CeeLo Green in disguise.

in Riverbend

Riverbend’s Faith and Family night headliner TobyMac was discovered this afternoon to be none other than singer CeeLo Green in disguise. Mr. Green was banned by festival organizers last year after a profanity-laden performance that upset many Riverbend attendees. “We noticed something was amiss when Mr Mac arrived a bit…

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Basil Marceaux makes surprise appearance at Riverbend’s Silent Disco

in Riverbend

To much surprise for many in attendance at tonight’s Silent Disco during Riverbend, former Tennessee Republican gubernatorial nominee and entrepreneur Basil Marceaux added DJ to his ever growing repertoire. Marceaux explained to Riverbend officials he hopes his beats will “make the people of the silent disco feel freer than they did yesterday.” “It’s… it’s…

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Riverbend organizers give up, outsource Insane Clown Posse

in Culture/Riverbend

At a press conference yesterday afternoon it was announced that Friends of the Festival, the organization that coordinates the annual Riverbend music festival, has outsourced next year’s event and all future events to the Michigan horrorcore hip-hop duo Insane Clown Posse. “We give up,” said head Riverbend organizer Ginger Dewarr.…

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Christian band Newsboys banned from Riverbend after offensive performance

in Culture/Riverbend

The headlining act of the 2013 Riverbend Festival’s Family & Faith Night, the Australian Christian rock band Newsboys, has been banned from performing at future Riverbend Festivals after a controversial Tuesday night performance. The band members, clad in black leather clothing, gave a performance filled with gratuitous nudity, onstage drinking…

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