City of Chattanooga to close every downtown business, all to reopen as Hotel or Escape Game

in Business

According to City of Chattanooga spokesman Larry McDowell, plans have been put in place to temporarily close down every downtown business and reopen them as large scale hotels or escape games. The announcement comes after numerous new escape skill games have opened in the area and the development of about 30 hotels.

“The future is now in escaping, sleeping, or a place to do some adultery things” exclaimed local zoning board member Kevin Thompson.

Some experts believe new city tax incentives will bring about hotels that incorporate escape games in its guest rooms.

“We think people will go wild for a challenging escape from a glass hotel room with no door,” explained hotel builder Jerry Slanders. “The only problem we face now is where to unload all this sea life.”