The TFP's listing on Craigslist to sell The Chattanooga Bystander

Times Free Press lists Chattanooga Bystander for sale on Craigslist

The TFP's listing on Craigslist to sell The Chattanooga Bystander
The TFP’s listing on Craigslist to sell The Chattanooga Bystander

After purchasing The Chattanooga Bystander yesterday for $19 million dollars, the daily newspaper Chattanooga Times Free Press announced that it was selling the newly acquired online news website on Craigslist “for $199 or best offer.”

The Craigslist advertisement also stated that the Times Free Press was open to possibly trading it for a used lawnmower in good working condition or a set of grow lights.

“We made a huge mistake,” said TFP managing editor Jordan Krampton. “The Chattanooga Bystander is a massive liability, and it’s just a matter of time before some local celebrity or rich politician sues these assholes.”

“If there are no takers, then we’ll probably just give it away on Freecycle,” said Krampton.

Francis Porkloin is a reporter for today, for you, for me, for us, for our children, for our children's children, and for our children's children's grandparents - which is us, again. Francis Porkloin is devoted to giving a voice to all people, including those who do not have mouths or have had them wired shut and can only make incomprehensible "Mmmrph! Mmmrph!" sounds. Francis Porkloin is committed to delivering the unbiased truth and telling the stories that others have no interest in telling - and that the public has no interest in hearing. Francis Porkloin is a Sagittarius.

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